The Anti-paste of Fear is Love

If we didn't have the emotion called fear, our feelings, we wouldn't try to have the necessary equipment to protect ourselves and our loved ones in this world, and maybe we wouldn't even try to protect ourselves. Probably without our sense of fear we would have become insensitive, aggressive beings. We would not be able to take precautions against any danger, we would not even realize that danger was approaching, and when the danger or threat descended upon us, we would probably disappear before we could do anything about it. 

In a world without fear, perhaps each of us would have to become a tyrant, because we would not have acquired the skills that would keep us from hurting others. Indeed, we humans gain strength, courage and confidence at the end of every experience in which we dare to face fear. I think that this judgment, this proposition, applies both to us as adults and to our children. The confrontation involves pushing ourselves to get out of our comfort zone. 

As you know, the first step of growth and development always requires leaving the comfort zone and entering the "fear zone". We always feel safer in our comfort zone, in the familiar environment that we control. In our comfort zone, life is much more defined, predictable, our environment and the people around us are familiar. It is an environment we trust. 

Therefore, taking the first step out of the comfort zone puts us in the fear zone where there are many uncertainties. We can make excuses to get back into the comfort zone, we can be easily influenced by the opinions of others. Because it is easy to return to the comfort zone. Our brain looks for and wants the familiar. The field of fear requires us to stay on the path with determination. Only after we show the courage to move forward on that path despite our fears, to make mistakes, to break, to fail, to put ourselves out there, we gain new experiences, we learn, we develop. Every experience we gain in this field gives us strength, courage and self-confidence. 

If we never take our children out of their comfort zones, if we don't support them to be present, if we solve all the problems for them when they face the slightest difficulty, if we say "okay, give up, don't worry, don't get tired, don't strain, don't get bored", we take away their opportunity to develop. In fact, we would not be doing them a favor, we would be doing them a disservice with all our good intentions. Doesn't our experiences that we have gained over the years in our own life adventures show us this? I believe that the most delicate balance in parenting is to control ourselves. To be able to decide when, how much and to what extent to rein in our instinctive protectiveness and fears. The antipode of fear, the anti-rust counter-emotion, is love. 

Bondage is bad, freedom is good. The thing that enslaves people the most is the feeling of fear. It is the fear of loss. The more a person fears, the more dependent he becomes, and the more dependent he becomes, the more afraid he becomes, the more withdrawn he becomes, the more he wants to protect himself in this way. Or rather he thinks he is protecting himself. The fear of losing one's job, one's spouse, one's lover, one's reputation, one's money, one's possessions, one's property, makes one even more dependent on these things. When what he fears happens to him, he is devastated, depressed, and finally he cannot even think of suicide after this situation that he cannot get out of. 

Addiction is one of the greatest weaknesses of human beings. The ego, in other words the sense of self-righteousness, gets its fuel from addictions. This is because it is the result of an addiction that also feeds the sense of fear in people. The funny thing is that any human being doesn't realize that he or she is addicted, because he or she calls his or her addictions love, love, responsibility, pride, conscience, obligation, and thanks to his or her ego's ability to justify and his or her mastery of making excuses, he or she has found a wonderful cover for his or her personal weakness! 

It is generally believed that the opposite of love is hate. But to me, the opposite of love is fear. The only way to get rid of fear is to accept it and heal its rottenness so that it can be transformed back into love. The real power in life comes from love. Only when you feel the light of love coming from within you can you live your life without fear. But to be loved, you must first love unconditionally. It is of course not easy to get rid of years of fears, anger, disappointments, resentments, resentments and to shed the layers of negative emotions. Inside human beings there are many conflicting personalities with different voices, and all of them are filled with the fear of being hurt. 

When you feel fear, stop for a moment and you will realize that you are actually most afraid of being afraid. When you dive into fear and embrace it with courage, you will see that this emotion inside you calms down like a wild horse taming, your self becomes peaceful and finally surrenders to happiness and love.

With respect and love